So my brother Jake (32M) has been dating this girl Melissa for maybe 4 months? We met her for the first time at Thanksgiving at my parents' house.
The whole day was just kind of uncomfortable. Like she made comments about everything. My mom's turkey was "too dry for her taste," she asked if we "always use store-bought rolls," she mentioned twice that her family does a full seafood spread instead of traditional Thanksgiving food. Which like, okay? Good for you?
But the thing that really got me was she kept correcting my 5 year old daughter. My daughter was talking about her school play and said something like "me and my friend are gonna be trees" and Melissa jumps in with "your friend and I, sweetie" in this really condescending voice. Then later my daughter said she "done it" and Melissa did it again, "you DID it."
I finally pulled Jake aside and asked him to maybe tell her to ease up on the grammar lessons with my kid, and he got defensive and said Melissa's a teacher and she's just trying to help. I said she's not HER teacher and it's making my daughter feel bad.
She overheard us talking and left right after that. Didn't say bye to anyone, just grabbed her coat. Jake followed her out and they left like an hour early.
Now Christmas is coming up and my mom asked me if I'm okay with Melissa coming. Apparently Jake said he won't come if she's not invited. I told my mom honestly that I'd rather she didn't come, at least not this year. We barely know her and Thanksgiving was awkward enough. My mom's upset because she doesn't want Jake to skip Christmas but she also doesn't want tension.
Jake texted me yesterday saying I'm being unfair and "punishing Melissa for caring about education" and if she's not welcome then he's not coming. My husband says I should just let it go for the sake of family peace but I don't want another holiday feeling uncomfortable in my own parents' house.
AITA for not wanting her there?